A friend of mine recently suggested that it might be fun to get a group of bloggers together to contribute a weekly blog post on the same subject, then link to each other's blogs so that we can all see the posts.
Since I am all for being given a topic to write about, I said I was in.
It was decided that Thursday would be the post day, and guess what today is? Thursday!
The inaugural topic was chosen by Melissa (www.merrylandgirl.blogspot.com)
Other bloggers contributing are:
Desperate Madness
Froggie Knits Like Crazy
At first, I really didn't know what I was going to say about this topic as all my friendships have been formed in the traditional fashion.
There is one recent friendship that some people may find odd. I am good friends with my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. I am actually even friends with my ex-boyfriend, but that's a little more predictable.
So, here's the back story:
2006-2008, I dated Mike. We got a long great, but never really clicked in an adult way - like "who is going to pay this bill?" or "how come we have no money for groceries?". I had a very naive way of thinking, I just assumed that because he was the man, I would give my wages to him and he would suss out all the financial details. This was not the case.
I had never actually *told* him of this arrangement, I kind of just expected it.
I came to find out later, that he was looking for the same from me.
We were both financially irresponsible, and in the end no matter how well you get on as friends or lovers, money problems cause civil unrest to the point where all you can do is end it.
And end it did. Abruptly and heartbreakingly.
I will skip past the pathetic and desperate ramblings of the dumped (me) and bring you to May 2009.
A lot had changed since Mike and I had broken up. We managed to squeak past the awkwardness for the sake of our social circle, and eventually learned to casually co-exist.
I was (and continue to be) completely smitten with the man who would become my husband, so it was easy to forget about my heartbreak.
Mike brought his girlfriend, Lisa, to a friend's BBQ and I was really, really nervous to meet her. Part of me was afraid that she would be rude or (gasp!) better looking than me.
That meeting was quite uneventful. She was polite, but reserved. We didn't really talk, and when Mike and I would bring up an inside joke, or refer to an event that occurred before she was in his life, she did look visibly annoyed.
Then, I heard that the social circle started to divide because no one wanted to host an awkward gathering where the ex and the current were giving each other the stink eye across the room. (For the record, that never happened)
In September of 2009, we all went to a birthday party and I was so nervous that I ended up inadvertantly getting drunk.
While not so great for my liver, imbibing usually cuts down on my shyness and makes me quite friendly (not that I use booze as a social lubricant very often...)
Lisa and I started chatting, and by the end of the night we were friends on Facebook.
She's a really great person, and we have a lot in common. She has a great sense of humor and I am glad that we are friends.
I think they are great together, and I am glad to have found an unexpected friendship in her.
That's an interesting story. I used to befriend the girlfriends of guys I liked. I didn't consider them to be enemies or competition, but I think it made things more comfortable and I wouldn't have to hate them for being with someone I couldn't have. I also befriended my friends' boyfriends and/or husbands.
ReplyDeleteI reconnected on myspace with a girl who was dating one of my friends in HS and I had chosen to befriend her at the time. We lost touch later on and then I found her on myspace because we had similar interests but I couldn't figure out who she was at first. We still have a lot in common and I'm glad we reconnected. She barely even talks to the guy in question.